Sometimes, when you least expect it, you connect with who you used to be, every song triggers a memory, it’s like your whole life is a highway and the feelings you thought were gone forever have suddenly shown up and are now riding shotgun.
I used to live in winter. It was a part of my life. The anticipation, those damp October nights, those dreary November days and then finally December, cold with snow. You stayed inside and played board games. “Wide World Of Sports” was the most fascinating program on television. You went outside in your flannel-lined jeans and romped in the snow and when your clothing had frozen board stiff you trundled up to your front door where your mom made you hot chocolate and you felt fully alive in a way you rarely do anymore.
That’s what’s great about the cold, it’s invigorating. Stay still and you’ll freeze. Keep moving and you’ve got no idea what you’ll encounter.
When you’re twenty two, the world is your oyster, you’re gonna eat it alive, you’re full of vigor, overflowing with optimism.
Then you get older and waste so much time you find yourself just existing, wondering what’s around the next corner, if anything.
You’re haunted by your memories. You think they’re just that and then you stumble into someone you used to know and they’re just as damaged as you are, but the sight of each other makes your hearts palpitate, there’s a little spark of hope that wasn’t there yesterday, making you feel like this life is worth living, even though the downs oftentimes outweigh the ups.