We think we know where we’re going. We have a plan and stick to it. Or we fall into something and do our best to get ahead and then suddenly…time has passed, we’re older, we can’t get back to where we once belonged, we can’t start over, and suddenly we’re not sure we like where we are.
It’s the human condition. It causes firings, quittings and divorces. It’s our one and only go-round and we don’t want to make a mistake. And what they don’t tell you is it’s hard enough to accomplish one thing, never mind everything. Suddenly you take a good look around because you’re never going to be back. You lose your looks, you’ve still got the sexual fantasy, but not quite the ability, and the people at Costco are younger than you.
And that’s when you hear “See The Changes” on the radio.
That’s exactly what happened yesterday.
After seeing the two bedraggled men exiting the building wearing brand new bright orange Fila sneakers, on sale for barely double digits, after holding back from scolding the mother with the toddler balancing on the handrail of the cart, about to fall off, after seeing a 65″ TV for $3500, after realizing that while I was busy in my house trying to make it for twenty five years, everything changed, I tuned into the mellifluous sound of Stephen Stills telling me he experienced the same damn thing.
It’s hard to rearrange. That’s what freaks me out about my contemporaries, not their eagerness to diet and fit into children’s clothing, but their lack of desire to change. They like physical books, they abhor the DVR, they’re dead and they don’t even know it yet. They’ve given up. And what happens next is you’re discarded. Like the Republican Party, which couldn’t read the statistics, which didn’t realize the immigrant tsunami, the people of color, were going to bury them. Adjust or die.
And I was once young too, with an answer for everything. But now I hit countless dead ends. I know Verizon has better connections than AT&T, that all those using another provider are having a second-rate experience, but maybe they have a good sex life, maybe the connection just doesn’t matter.